some thoughts on socialization

I am homeschooling my daughter. I don't get too many questions about it, once in a while someone will say that they wish they could. Everyone so far has been enthusiastic and supportive. (Of course Amelia is almost always with me, so that may mitigate some people, but that's fine.) Once in a while someone with ask about the socialization thing though. This , to me, is such a no-brainer. I know that Amelia is not getting that 6 hours, 5 days a week with the same people experience, but I'm not sure that that is the best, certainly not the only model of socialization. We live in a place with 16 children, ranging in age from 12 to a newborn. On nice weekends or after school, now that the days are longer, there are at least some children to play with. In the summer it's one 2-month long play date. We have other friends that we visit a lot and we go to his school regularly for some after school play, Amelia is enrolled in 2 or three extra-curricular activities. She meets lots of children.

Something that struck me that she may get out of this different model of socialization is the ability to make all sorts of friends, with all sorts of different people. I think that often in a larger classroom situation that it can be easy for children to fall into groups of friends with similar likes and dislikes, similar favourite games, etc. Amelia has the opportunity to learn how to make friends with children that she otherwise might not. For example, there is a boy in our friend's class who is also in one of the out of school classes with Amelia. I know from my adult conversations that this child is 'the problem child' in his class, and that his classmates look upon him this way. There are many of his behaviours that I don't like, and that I have a hard time being around. But Amelia takes them in stride, and considers him a friend. I think that if she were in this class, it would be hard for her to have this same friendship. Partly because she would be exposed his behaviour for longer, but also because she would probably be with a group of girls who like to read and play princess, and none of them would want to be around this boy either. She even knows that it's hard for him and he gets in trouble in their class together, but this doesn't impact her opinion of him. I can't say that one way or another is better, I just think that it's neat that Amelia is free to be friends with someone she might not otherwise.

I think even with less extreme examples of difference, it's great that Amelia gets to learn how to be friends with all sorts of different people; she can play hockey with some of the boys, or farm with the older kids, or just run around with the little boys. With our close friends L and A, she knows what sort of play they do well together, even though, again, in a straight school setting, she might not be friends with L.

To me, that type of socialization is important in the "real world", yes, there are people that we are naturally going to be friends with and want to hang out with, but the real skill is to be able to be comfortable being friends with people who are very different from ourselves. To be able to understand how to be able to work with and have fun with people that might not be our 'type'. I hope that this kind of socialization continues for my children no matter what path we go.

Why I love living in a rainforest, (and chores)

I love moss! This kind is especially nice, it's very dense and soft and green.

Here is the chore chart we made a few weeks ago. We went to a store called Urban Source and found a sheet with about 100 sticky-backed square magnets on it. I have left room on the magnets so we could draw in little representations of each chore, but we haven't done that part yet. There are no rewards for chores beyond the thrill of getting a magnet under your name, but so far that is often enough of an incentive. Burke likes to do chores, even without the chart (that's the stage he's at right now, Amelia went through that too). Amelia would rather be curled up on the couch with a book, but she wants to have the same if not more that Burke, so that pushes her sometimes. I'm not very vigilant about getting them to do chores, so it's a good reminder for me too. I also find it somehow externalizes the chore process for me. I don't have to nag, they even come and ask sometimes. We now also have some 'fancy' (the shiny wrappers from Easter chocolates) magnets for non-standard chores. Amelia likes to earn those!